I was stuck at home watching documentries.

I love babies even more now.

the show was about the development life in the womb.

how inone single second the body system is

first grown from cells.

and the skeleton is formed.

that the heart beat can just start beating away just like that.

that 14 week feotus can yawn and move inside.

it just caught me in fasination .

how the nervous system if you can see it ,

is really like little flashes of

electricity running through our body.

that most babies die in the first trimester.

at the same time im scared and at the very same moment i want

just adore a child.

that how the heart can just simply suddenly start.

mind you without the development of the brain yet.

you know its going out to you.

some times i have to accept that

i cant have my cake and eat it.

right....

smack me !